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Well, I am going to try and make my aunt a dr. appointment tomorrow. She is going back downhill and I am not going to let that happen. She has a sore throat and she is hoarse. She has been trying to be more independent over the past couple of weeks and I think it has taken its toll.

She has always been a very independent woman and she has hated to lose that feeling. I am doing my best to make sure she keeps it. She has been getting herself cleaned up and has been changing her nightgown or getting dressed, if we have plans. I think She has more trouble than she was willing to admit and let some needs unattended. I am trying to repair the damage that has been done already.

I have been running around in circle since all this began, but it has been worse over the past few weeks. Taking care of one woman full time is hard enough, but trying to help two other is almost impossible. I am running myself ragged and wonder how much I have left.

My aunt-in-law suffered a setback yesterday and I was called in to help. We talked her into getting Rescue Alert a few years ago and it has been a lifeline for her. She fell and I tried to go and pick her up. It was a sight with me, at 5' nothing and 115 and her 200+, trying to get her off the floor. She wasn't any help, so I had to call for reinforcements. Two of her nephews showed up and one of them got her up. She bruised her butt and hit her head. She was just a sight sprawled out with her pudding cup just out of reach. She somehow lost her balance and her grip on the walker and tumbled over. I told her I knew pudding would be her downfall. She laughed.

I guess I can give a little background on my special ward. She has RA, peripheral neuropathy, HBP, CHF, and general old age issues. The doctors have her on a multitude of medications that totally baffle me. If she was having a good quality of life, I wouldn't bat an eye. The truth of the matter is she seems to be waiting to die. She has been netter since I've been there, but now she is getting sick and not doing anything again. It took me 2 weeks to get her to starting eating on a regular basis and now I feel it may be undone. I am going to make her an appointment on Monday and see what is going on this time. She keeps making me promise I won't put her in the hospital and I am trying my best.

Tomorrow I will see how she is doing and whether she feels any better. Until then...

Link: http://www.nationalmssociety.org/chapters/INI/donate/index.aspx

I really had every intention of keeping this going in a normal fashion, but things have turned out differently. In early October, my husband's favorite aunt was out in the hospital. We were put in charge of her dog and found out after day 2, she wanted her at our house. We have not had any animals in the house since we moved here last year, but an exception was made. All turned out pretty well, but we were glad when she went home.

Our aunt got out of the hospital the day before her 71st birthday. She was not ready by any stretch of the imagination. All she wanted was to go home and we respected her wishes. We brought the dog back and waited for the first signs of trouble, it didn't take long. A few hours after we got her home she called and wanted us to come and get the dog. We kept her for about a month. She is now back at her house and all is well with the dog. The aunt on the other hand is iffy right now.

Two days after she got home she realized she couldn't do things by herself. I had went over on her birthday, a Sunday, and made her an offer. I told her if she was willing to help me with my upcoming student loans, I would help take care of her. I told her to think about it and let me know. She called the next morning and wondered where I was. I jumped into action.

Some days I wonder if I got in over my head, but then I feel good about what I am doing. I have found myself doing things for her I had never thought I would do. We haven't always been close, but I finally grew on her. I have seen such major improvements in the last month in a half, but now she is starting to worry me again. She has had a sore throat for a few days and now is coughing up mucous. I initially thought it could be her sinuses, but I'm beginning to wonder. She seems extremely weak today and actually had a fall. This was the first fall in almost 2 months.I'm going to worry about her all night.

The only problems I have is I sometimes feel taken advantage of a lot. Once she started feeling better she started loaning me out to her neighbor and her best friend. I don't feel right taking money from a 73 and 84 year old lady. They are sweet and lonely. One of them more so than the other.

I guess that is not really the only problem I'm having, but its the biggest. Some days are very difficult for me because of my multiple sclerosis. The stress of the day-to-day needs of these women can be overwhelming.I feel as if I am constantly chasing my tail. I can't afford to have an exacerbation at this time. It makes me realize to need to take a few minutes for myself, but trying to find a good time is hard.

Once again, I am going to try to utilize this blog. It feels like just yesterday that I made a commitment to start writing on a regular basis. Since then, life has been up and down. The whole blog has been erased and I am starting fresh. I am going to be talking about family, life, my battle with Multiple Sclerosis, and my views on whatever issues I want to talk about. The things I post are my opinions and if you don't agree that's ok. I respect everyone's rights and opinion. I only ask you do the same for me.

Ok, let me give a little background about me. I am 36 years old, a wife, and mother of 4. Three of my kids live with me and my husband. I have a 16 year old daughter who she lives with her dad. I have 3 boys ages 19, 8, and 6. I was diagnosed with MS in Feb. of 2008. My husband has been wonderful and very supportive of me since my diagnosis. Don't get me wrong, he was supportive before, but it has really affected him too.

I recently completed my second associates degree , which I'm pretty proud of myself for obtaining. I have one in accounting and one in business finance. I graduated with a 3.7 GPA and I thought that was awesome. I dropped out of high school and received my GED in 1991, so this was monumental for me.

My husband and I have been together for 14 years and we are very happy with each other. We were able to buy our first house last year, which has turned into an absolute nightmare. I will go into that story in another post.

Anyway, I'm attempting to keep this going this time. If I am able to, you will see why it has been so hard to continue before.

Mom

I guess I will give some info about my kids. As I said in the first post,my daughter lives with her dad and my 3 boys live with me and my hubby. I will give the rundown and the order of their ages. Ok, here we go.

My oldest son is 19 years old and just started college. I amazed everyday at the remarkable young man he has turned out to be. He has a job now and I am so proud of him. We used to be very close, but we have grown apart some over the past couple of years. Teenage girls were the first bone of contention. I did want him to date and tramp and he want to date a tramp. We got over that hump, but when I was diagnosed with MS things changed. I think because we were so close, it hit him very hard. He doesn't like it when I talk about it and doesn't want to have much to do with the subject. He is just worried I will die. What do you say to you kid when that could happen? I understand how he feels, but I need his support instead of what I'm getting from him. Anyway, he has always been a good student, but slacked some through junior high and most of high school. He never dropped below a C average, but now he's back to his A potential. He was a star basketball player for his high school team and earned multiple awards and honors for his athletic talent. Talk about being proud, I couldn't contain myself sometimes. His senior year took a bad turn and he tore his ACL. The season was over for him and I was devastated for him. I have 19 years worth of things about who my husband calls, "The Golden Boy", but one thing is I am proud of him.

Next, is my daughter. She is 16 and we have had a rocky relationship. She lives in Florida with her dad and we speak on the phone. She is a good student and is active in her school choir. She loves her school and has 2 little sisters she helps take care of. My story with her is pretty detailed and I'm not sure where to start, so I'll save it for another time.

And then there was a pickle. Number three is my 8 year old son. He got his nickname because he ate his first pickle at 6 months and has had a love for them since then. He is in the third grade and overall he likes school. I think he has some trouble sometime and gets frustrated, but I think he catch on. He is such a smart little boy and does the work when he wants to do it. The people at school think he absolutely wonderful and will soon find his niche in life. I am beginning to think choir my be good for him. We will have to wait and see. He loves playing on the computer and its amazing how fast he catches on to things he likes.

Last, but not least is the 6 year old. He is the total package child. He is smart, cute, charming and a whole lot of other stuff wrapped up in one kid. We think this could be a problem and he may be the one who wins. He gives us this big grin when we tell him that. He just started kindergarten and he is doing good, which a few exceptions. He is very stubborn and has refused to read. He is an amazing reader for his age, but he hates being forced to do anything. He keeps you on your toes and keeps you guessing what he will do next. He is creative and can make a box into something magical. Ah, to be a kids again. On second thought, no thanks.

So, this is a rundown on the kids and the one of the reason I keep going. My husband is the other and I will talk about him shortly. You will be hearing a lot about the kids along the way because they provide a lot of entertainment for us all.